Dynasty Doomsday

Ken Kelly

mayan calendar

Those kooky Mayans!

For years, some “experts” have predicted today would bring with it an apocalypse as predicted by the Mayan calendar that abruptly stops on today’s date. If you’re reading this, the sun has not exploded, the Earth has not collapsed on its axis, vampires have not taken over the world (the Twilight movies don’t count) and you’re not currently on fire (though if you are, we’re totally giving you a free DLF T-shirt for your dedication). Yes, it’s December 21, 2012 and our planet is still intact. I can write this because if it’s not, you really can’t hold me accountable.

Since we seem to have been given the gift of life until the next great “end of times” prediction, it seemed like the perfect day to wonder just what it would be like to be able to see into the future. If we all had a crystal ball, we’d never get burned on the waiver wire, we’d make all the right rookie picks and we’d have no problem setting the perfect weekly lineup. Unfortunately, this is reality and we don’t have those amazing abilities. The Mayans even had trouble as indicated by our existence today. As someone once said, “If the Mayans were so good at predicting the future, there would still be Mayans.”

With all that being said, here are some dynasty questions I’d love to be able to whip out a special calendar and have the answers for right now instead of later.

How will this year’s massive workload impact Arian Foster?

Foster is two carries away from his career high (327) and is getting very close to the magic number of 370 where running backs traditionally have a hard time bouncing back from. When you consider his yards per carry average has decreased in each of the last three seasons, it’s fair to be concerned about his utilization. Since the Texans could be poised to make a deep run in the playoffs, his total touches should be monitored by every one of his dynasty owners – you just wish you knew now just how it was going to impact him in the future.

Will players with injury risks finally get healthy?

Dynasty owners have been burned repeatedly by the likes of Darren McFadden, Ryan Mathews, Hakeem Nicks, Roy Helu and countless others. If there was one wish any dynasty owner had, it would likely be the ability to predict injuries. With some of these players, it actually hasn’t been that difficult to do just that. Will they ever get healthy?

What will the career numbers of Alfred Morris look like?

There may not be another rookie in the history of dynasty leagues who could be third in the league in rushing (1,322 yards), have nine touchdowns through week sixteen and still be treated like the bubonic plague in many leagues. If you knew he could put up these stats consistently and not be another victim of his flaky coach, he’d be the best bargain in many dynasty leagues at the moment.

How many good years can we get from our veteran studs?

Selling high is the key in the management of any dynasty league team. Wouldn’t it be great to know when the careers of Drew Brees, Peyton Manning, Adrian Peterson, Tom Brady, Steven Jackson and so many others will just go in the tank?

What is the ceiling for RGIII?

It seems the ceiling for him this year is being the QB1 in fantasy leagues. Once he gets some better weapons around him and gets acclimated to the league, just how high can he soar? Will he be able to stay healthy and avoid the big hits? How many games will he average a year? Oh, if we could only know!

Are we seeing the start of great careers or one year wonders?

I mentioned Morris earlier, but there are others who have burst on to the scene this year like Cecil Shorts, Stevan Ridley, Russell Wilson and Danario Alexander. There are also others who are having career years like Dez Bryant, Randall Cobb and Demaryius Thomas. We tend to just pencil in stats from the previous season and hope that past performance really does predict future results, but we’ve all been burned before. Anyone still have Laurent Robinson on their roster? Anyone? Anyone?

Is Michael Vick done?

The saga of Michael Vick will go down as one of the strangest in history, that we know for sure. What we don’t know is if he’ll have one more short burst of magic as the quarterback of the Bills, Cardinals or some other desperate team next season. We’ve seen him be about as bad as you could imagine, but we’ve also seen him win leagues for owners in the past.

Will Larry Fitzgerald’s career always be defined as “what could have been?”

It’s sad, but true. Fitzgerald has been the victim of some terrible quarterback play in his career and it’s not getting better any time soon. The Cardinals aren’t quite bad enough to get an elite prospect in the draft (there may not be one this year anyway) and the market for quarterbacks this off-season isn’t that great. I mean, really, are you going to feel great about having Fitzgerald if he has Mark Sanchez throwing him the ball instead of Ryan Lindley? I can tell you unequivocally that one thing is very clear to me now – Kurt Warner is a Hall of Famer.

Will Brandon Marshall stay on the straight and narrow?

We have two games to go and Marshall has already set a career high in receptions (107), yards (1,398) and has tied his career best in touchdowns with ten. There’s risk associated with Marshall since you never know when he may slip on a McDonald’s bag, but if he’s really turned a corner in his life, he’s going to be a huge factor in determining league champions over the next three or four seasons.

In the end, the Mayans were wrong and we can move forward. Doomsday has come and gone yet again and we can enjoy a brisk Winter day with a temperature between 20 and 70 degrees, instead of the 1,250 degrees predicted in today’s really long-term forecast. While we can all shake off this close call, it’s natural to think about just how amazing it would be to tell the future. Of course, we’d probably just ditch fantasy football and play the lottery every week.

Those are just a few of the questions I’d love to know the answers to. What would you want answered?  Post your thoughts below!

ken kelly