Everyone who reads this site knows that I love comparisons. You also know that I have a hard time thinking about anything else other than fantasy football around this time of year.
So, I thought of something today.
Fall brings us a new television season that’s bound to feature some hits and misses. While many of our old favorites have returned, there are many new shows promising to be the next big thing. Let’s surf around the Fall television lineup and see just how well the titles fit with some relevant fantasy football storylines.
Starring: Tom Brady
Tom Brady has 1,327 passing yards in just three games this season. While he’s not quite on pace for 90, 210 yards this season, he IS on pace for over 7,000. Just stop and think about that for a moment.
30 Rock (NBC)
Starring: The Kansas City Chiefs
The Chiefs are a disaster. With Jamaal Charles out for the season, their offense is a complete mess. To make things worse, their defense isn’t much better. Their point differential after three weeks is -82 and they’re losing games by an average score of 36-9, so it shouldn’t surprise you to see a score of 30-0 (30 rock), at any point this season. This has quickly turned into a wasteland for fantasy performance, with only Dwayne Bowe salvaging any type of value.
The Amazing Race (CBS)
Starring: The Quarterbacks
Tom Brady isn’t the only player making Dan Marino shake in his isotoners. Marino’s single season passing record of 5,084 yards is on pace to be broken by five different players. Tom Brady (on pace for 7,077), Drew Brees (on pace for 5,648), Cam Newton (on pace for 5,397), Philip Rivers (on pace for 5,221) and Matt Stafford (on pace for 5,189) are all in the mix after three weeks. While they’ll all inevitably cool down here soon, NINE starting quarterbacks are averaging 300 yards passing per game, which is simply ridiculous. It’s clear that quarterbacks are dominating the early fantasy season.
American Idol (FOX)
Starring: Tony Romo
Has anyone gone from the outhouse to the penthouse faster than Tony Romo this season? After one week, he was criticized for being terrible in the clutch. Two weeks later, he’s America’s hero for playing through pain and leading an otherwise confused team to two big wins.
Are we there yet? (TBS)
Starring: Miami, Indianapolis, Kansas City, Minnesota and St. Louis
The silver lining for all these 0-3 teams is that they’re all in the mix for the next big thing in dynasty leagues, Stanford quarterback Andrew Luck. For a few of these franchises, the season can’t end fast enough.
Big Brother (CBS)
Starring: New England
Sorry, couldn’t resist the spygate reference.
Body of Proof (ABC)
Starring: Cam Newton
I guess we needed to see more than just the preseason to determine just how good Cam Newton was, eh? While he only has one win to his credit, Newton is showing early that he has the talent to be a future QB1 in dynasty leagues much, much earlier than any of us could have expected.
Breakout Kings (A&E)
Starring: Mark Sanchez and Matt Stafford
Sometimes it’s just a matter of time. Matt Stafford and Mark Sanchez have both exceeded expectations in fantasy thus far and are rewarding any dynasty owner who held on to them over a rough couple of seasons.
Cougar Town (ABC)
Starring: Kevin Kolb
Former Houston Cougar Kevin Kolb has taken the reigns of the Cardinals and has revitalized Larry Fitzgerald‘s fantasy value. While Kolb hasn’t exactly been stellar, Fitzgerald can finally be relied on as a solid WR1 again.
Criminal Minds (CBS)
Starring: The Cincinnati Bengals
I mean, really. You’re so lazy that you need to have your pot mailed to you? I couldn’t even believe that was possible, but Jerome Simpson has proven me wrong. At what point do you just stop caring if you’re a Bengals fan? I just wonder if it came with a box of chocolates.
Expedition Impossible (ABC)
Starring: The Seattle Offense
This group is putrid. While Sidney Rice showed some signs of life last week, every other player is pretty much worthless in fantasy right now. Marshawn Lynch, Zach Miller and Mike Williams are nearly useless at this point.
Free Agents (NBC)
Starring: Clinton Portis, Larry Johnson, Tiki Barber, Kevin Smith and Laurence Maroney
What is the shelf life for an NFL running back anymore?
It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia (FX)
Starring: Jeremy Maclin
Maclin’s mystery illness had his owners very nervous that he could miss the season…then he really scared people when he was being tested for cancer. Nothing like that to put fantasy football into perspective, eh. It’s great that he turned out to be healthy, regardless of any fantasy football related impact.
Last Man Standing (ABC)
Starring: Eli Manning and Ahmad Bradshaw
The Giants are a total mess this season in regards to injuries. Their defense has been decimated and both Hakeem Nicks and Mario Manningham have been dealing with their own issues. Throw in the season ending injury to Domenik Hixon and this team is going to be lucky to make it to Halloween intact.
Rules of Engagement (CBS)
Starring: Michael Vick
Anyone want to take a guess on the player who has had the most penalties called on the opposition for roughing the passer over the past two years? Yep, it’s Michael Vick – the same guy complaining about getting hit and not getting the calls. Maybe he should target his offensive line instead. Regardless, he’s not going to make it through this season at this pace, either. If I’m a fantasy owner with Vick, I’m making sure I have a really good backup.
Two and a Half Men (CBS)
Starring: The Carolina Panthers Running Attack
This is just maddening. DeAngelo Williams signs a monster contract and hasn’t done a thing so far. Jonathan Stewart is doing more with his chances, but is still getting just a handful of touches each game as the Panthers are going pass heavy. Meanwhile, Mike Goodson has been a total afterthought. There was a day when both Stewart and Williams could be used in fantasy, but now neither can be counted on.
Starring: Denarius Moore, Stevan Ridley, Kendall Hunter, Torrey Smith and Randall Cobb
None of these players were likely taken in the top five of your dynasty rookie draft this season, but all have shown the ability to be a serious force in dynasty leauges. Will one of them step up and challenge for offensive rookie of the year?
Those are just a few storylines that make dynasty leagues so much fun!
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